Film by Henry Bromell, 2000

“If you get the feeling you’re dead, why bother to get up?” Alex (William Macy) asks his shrink (John Ritter) at the start of this film. Rather than panic, resignation initially reigns in this moody, but oddly life-affirming film.

“Knowing your destiny…the trick is, after that, everything comes easy,” says Alex’s father. The problem is, Alex’s destiny was predetermined by his overbearing father, who persuaded Alex to inherit his business, “murderer-for-hire” by insisting the excellent paycheck was worth the loss of personal morals and compassion.

It is likely that most people do not have to make life or death decisions in deciding their careers.  I hope that no one has to worry about being forced into a future as a  paid murderer. But, most of us have been pressured by parents to follow dreams that belong to them rather than the child. In this movie, Alex is confronted by a life-changing decision that will determine either his independence or loss of self. The actions he takes reflect the conflicts that are often argued about and acted upon within families.

“The gun is stronger than you,” Dad said and proceeded to force Alex to kill a squirrel while Alex was still a child.   Alex did not enjoy killing the squirrel. The movie follows Alex’s evolution as he attempts to change his destiny.

There is a sense in this film that good will prevail, although personal sacrifice will be necessary to achieve that good. And so, Alex’s inner battle for higher moral ground and his attempt to determine his own destiny motivate him to meet with a psychiatrist where he confesses his secret profession. 

His wife, Martha, and son, Sammy, believe Alex’s home-based gadget business supports their lifestyle. However, they suspect that something in Alex’s life is causing him discontent and isolation from their family. Alex turns more and more inward, unable to discuss his predicament with his family.

In the psychiatrist’s waiting room, Alex meets Sarah, a 23-year-old, undomesticated, bi-sexual woman who shares Alex's discontent element in her  own personality.  The two are instantly attracted to each other and begin an affair. 

Martha's feelings of loneliness increase, and she suspects the affair before it actually begins.  Alex’s son senses the alienation his father feels. Trying to get closer to his father, Sammy one day asks Alex, “What is infinity?” “Infinity is endless,” Alex replies, turning away from his son and evading a deeper conversation.

Alex longs to quit his executioner job but fears the wrath of his father. He learns that his next victim is a personal friend. At that point, Alex realizes it is time to take control of his own destiny. He knows that he cannot murder a personal friend.

The ensuing events follow Alex's quest for redemption and peace in his soul. After a surprising turn of events that cannot be revealed in this review, the film reaches a climax as Alex unintentionally opens a new path for his wife, son, and himself to follow. The unexpected resolution, its quirky characters, plus its somewhat optimistic look towards the infinite future make this a film worth viewing and discussing with friends. As the film closes, Sammy says, “Nothing really ends.” And, a personal life trajectory can change course.

Nothing really ends, but life's journey certainly includes unexpected conflicts, unavoidable unpleasant encounters and decisions, illness, and mistakes.  Of course, life is full of immeasurable joy.   The possibility of joy in Alex's future remains a question in the film, but the viewer can envision a personal ending and a possible new beginning. The realization that one can ultimately change a destiny from a pain-filled past towards fulfillment offers comfort and faith in a peaceful future.